


where the lovelight gleams

by dayishujia



Category: Banana Fish (Anime & Manga)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Catholic Character, Christmas Fluff, Christmas Party, Domestic Fluff, Falling In Love, Fluff, Love Confessions, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-25
Updated: 2018-12-25
Packaged: 2019-09-27 07:36:26
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,003
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17157926
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/dayishujia/pseuds/dayishujia
Summary: Alex clicked his tongue. He turned his head a little, as if to get a better look at him. “I’m not sure what it is, but something’s different.”“What?” Bones appeared from around the kitchen door. He blinked a few times, glancing between Alex and Ash. “Is something the matter with the boss?”“Did you get into a fight with Eiji?” Kong asked, appearing over Bones’ shoulder.





	where the lovelight gleams

**Author's Note:**

> written for [eijiandash](https://eijiandash.tumblr.com/) on tumblr for the [banana fish holiday exchange](https://bananafishexchange2018.tumblr.com/)!
> 
> its somewhat late otl and totally a basic fic but....i hope you like it anyway eijiandash!

 

Christmas never really meant anything to Ash. It was just another day, same as any other.

When he was young, his father used to dress him up in the itchy clothes he hated so much and dragged him and his brother to the stuffy church in the town center and listen to the Father preach about the infinite love of God, something Ash had yet to feel in all his eighteen years.

Now, as an adult, Ash had yet to step foot in a church on a Sunday, on a holiday, ever. Not since he was ten and ran away from his aunt’s house to the city. He doubted he ever would go back.

Christmas was just another day.

 

Waking up in the loft he shared with Eiji, he quickly became aware of the bone-chilling frost in the air. Glancing at the floor-to-ceiling windows, he could see the snow piled in the window frame and the snowflakes falling from the grey sky.

It was snowing.

Ash turned his head, glancing across the room to where Eiji’s bed was. He was still sound asleep, burrowed under a mountain of blankets, leaving only his black mop of hair visible. The blankets rose and fell as he breathed and Ash wondered how he managed to not suffocate himself yet.

A sudden urge to climb into Eiji’s bed alongside him quickly flooded over him, leaving him unable to think about anything else. He wondered what Eiji would do if he did crawl into bed next to him, burrow under the blankets with him until they starved and had to give in to the urge to find something to eat.

Ash wondered, if he did take courage and curl up in Eiji’s bed, if Eiji would hug him; if he would wrap an arm around him and hold him as they nodded back off to sleep until the midday light filtered through the curtains.

Ash gave in to the urge. He threw his blankets off of him and quickly shuffled to Eiji’s bed, not wanting to touch the cold hardwood floors with his bare feet any longer than he had to, and clambered onto his bed.

“...Ash?”

Ash yanked the blankets back and over his shoulders, tucking himself in alongside his friend. “I was cold,” he said, by way of explanation.

Eiji shuffled closer, trapping one of Ash’s legs between his knees to better fit together. He tossed an arm over Ash’s neck and Ash shifted so that his other arm could pillow Ash’s neck.

“Merry Christmas, Ash,” Eiji whispered. His voice was deep, hoarse with sleep and Ash wanted to cry. He may not have ever known the love of God, but this had to be close.

Eiji, in his half-asleep state, tilted his head up and pressed a featherlight kiss to Ash’s chin. Ash curled his arm around Eiji’s side, just under his own arm, and pulled him closer. “I love you, Ash.”

Ash sobbed. The words, the earnest voice, his peaceful expression was all too much for him and the tears welled in his eyes and fell over his cheeks before he even knew he was crying. He hid his face in Eiji’s shoulder, curling further into his body as he cried.

Eiji’s grip around him tightened and he wondered if the older boy was finally fully awake.

“I love you, Ash,” he said again, mouth gently caressing the crown of Ash’s head when he spoke. “I’m sorry to say it now, like this. But… I thought you should know.”

“Thank you.”

Eiji chuckled. “You’re welcome.”

“Can…” Ash licked his lips. “Can you say it again?”

Eiji hummed. “I love you, Ash Lynx. I love you so much, I think my heart might explode.”

 

“Something is different about you, boss,” Alex said later. He tapped his forefinger against the wooden table in the crash pad's dining room.

Ash didn’t look up at him. He rested his head on his fist, just moments away from telling Sing and Eiji to turn off the Christmas music they were playing from the television speakers. “I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

Alex clicked his tongue. He turned his head a little, as if to get a better look at him. “I’m not sure what it is, but something’s different.”

“What?” Bones appeared from around the kitchen door. He blinked a few times, glancing between Alex and Ash. “Is something the matter with the boss?”

“Did you get into a fight with Eiji?” Kong asked, appearing over Bones’ shoulder.

“Of course we didn’t fight,” Ash snapped. His fist dropped to the table with a loud thud. “What are you guys talking about, nothing’s different with me. I’m the same as always.”

“Hey, Eiji!” Bones called out, turning where Eiji and Sing were perched on the sofa in the living room. “Did you and the boss get into a fight before we got here?”

“What?” Sing asked from his place on the couch. “Ash fought with Eiji?”

“We didn’t fight!” Ash snapped again, voice raising in volume.

“We didn’t fight,” Eiji confirmed with a smile, walking into the dining room. “We’re okay.” Then he looked at Ash and asked, “...Is something wrong with Ash?” He pressed the palm of his hand to Ash’s forehead, frowning when he didn’t feel an abnormal temperature. “Are you not feeling well?”

Ash bat his hand away. “I told you all, I’m _fine_.”

Eiji laughed, withdrawing his hand. “Okay, okay.”

Suddenly, the doorbell rang, cutting through the tension in the room, and Eiji excused himself to answer it. From the table, Ash could hear him greet their nosy neighbor, a middle aged housewife named Nancy. Not a moment later, did he see Eiji leading Nancy into the house with an armful of cookies.

“Look, Ash! Mrs Nancy made us sugar cookies!”

“Oh, you boys having a Christmas party? How lovely!” Nancy asked, looking around the room full of Ash’s gang members and the Chinese boss. “But you don’t have many decorations up! Not even a tree!”

Ash glanced around the apartment. It wasn’t decorated much at all, just enough so when nosy neighbors like Nancy appeared, the place looked more like a home and not just a crash pad from where they operated.

The holiday music streaming over the speakers didn't seem to impress Nancy or settle her motherly desires she often liked to play out on Eiji as she clucked her tongue.

“That won’t do! I think I have some extra decorations, be right back!”

A few moments later, she returned with a large, somewhat opaque storage box, filled to the brim with excess decorations. “Here you go, boys! Take whatever you like.”

“Thanks, Ms. Nancy,” Ash and Eiji said, Eiji with more enthusiasm than Ash.

Nancy dropped the box in the middle of the living room floor. “Just use whatever you want, no need to return them. I’ve got plenty of decorations!”

“Thank you, Ms. Nancy! This is great.”

“No problem, honey.” She smiled at him. “We all could use some holiday cheer. You kids should be having a good time, not lounging around, gloomy in the dark like this.”

Kong and Bones had already begun digging around in the box of decorations, Sing coming up behind them to peer inside.

“We’re not gloomy,” Ash argued, approaching them slowly, hands in his pockets.

Nancy looked at him, a well manicured eyebrow arching high upward. She didn’t believe him, that much was clear. Ash wasn’t sure what the neighbors knew or thought of the relationship he and Eiji had, but Nancy seemed to have her own idea when she asked, “Are you sure? You look like you’ve just fought with Eiji.”

Ash sputtered, surprised. “ _What_?”

“See?” Alex exclaimed, finger jabbing in their direction as if he were pointing something out to them. “That’s what I said.”

“We didn’t fight,” Eiji sighed with a pout. He looked sad when Ash glanced at him, is lower lip jutting out in a pout.

Nancy waved them off. “You’ll reconcile in no time,” she said dismissively. “Decorate your apartment, eat some cookies, and you’ll be in the spirit in no time!”

 

“Let’s put up the tree first!” Kong reached into the box and pulled out the pieces to a small Christmas tree. When Bones and Eiji agreed, he began to assemble, slotting the pieces together with minimal effort and stood it up on the coffee table.

“She’s got some good ornaments in here,” Sing said, rifling through the box. He pulled out a clear plastic box full of glittery red bulbs. “Let’s hang these.”

Sing, Eiji, Kong and Bones all flitted around the tree, decorating both it and the apartment until all the decorations in the box were used. At some point, the volume of the music streaming from the television speakers was turned up and it felt like a real holiday party, the kind that Ash only saw in movies.

“So,” Alex hummed, voice low so that the others couldn't hear. “You’re sure everything’s okay?”

Ash glanced at him. “I’m sure. Why are you all so convinced something is wrong?”

“Well… you’re quieter than normal,” he drawled. “And you keep watching Eiji, like you’re waiting for him to say something or for something to happen to him. Has something happened?”

“...No. Nothing like what you’re thinking,” Ash answered. “This place is still safe.”

“Alright.” Alex grabbed a cookie from Nancy’s festive plate and took a generous bite. He pushed the plate toward Ash.

  


By nightfall, the apartment was well decorated with Nancy’s donated decorations. The tall windows glittered with twinkling snowflake lights, red and green garland hung from the breakfast nook, and a little tree was erected in the corner of the living room, haphazardly decorated with red bulbs and white lights.

“It’s pretty.” Eiji stood in the middle of the expansive room, looking at their handiwork. The apartment was more decorated than it had ever been since they moved in, bright and colorful.  

Ash glanced around with a slight frown. He wasn’t yet sure what to make of the new decor. It was cheery, that was for sure, but it still left a somewhat sour feeling in his stomach. “I haven't decorated for the holidays…. In years.”

“We don’t do a lot in Japan either.” Eiji smiled at him. “But this is nice, isn’t it?”

“I guess.” Ash shrugged. He folded his arms over his chest. “If…. If you like it, then it’s nice.”

There was a long pause, then, “Ash?”

“Hm?”

“About… about what I said this morning,” Eiji started, his voice wavering. He didn’t return Ash’s gaze when he looked at him. Instead, he turned his stare onto their new little Christmas tree. “If it made you uncomfortable, I’m sorry. I didn’t mean --”

“It didn’t make me uncomfortable,” he interrupted.

Eiji’s face heated with a strong blush and he stuttered, despite himself, “R-really?”

“Yeah.” Ash ducked his head, hiding his own pink cheeks from Eiji’s view. “It… it was nice.”

Eiji leaned closer to Ash until their arms brushed, bending at the waist to try and meet his eyes. He didn’t force it when Ash twisted a little so his face remained hidden from him. “Yeah?”

“Yeah.” Ash rolled his bottom lip between his teeth. There was a pause where neither said anything, just enjoying the soft moment between them. Then, glancing up at Eiji, he asked, “C-can… Can you say it again?”

Eiji blinked, confused for a moment. He didn’t know what Ash wanted to hear, what he wanted him to say. He hadn’t said anything worth repeating, or so he thought. Then a small smile spread over his lips when it occurred to him. He leaned toward Ash on the sofa and whispered, “I love you, Ash Lynx.”

Ash made a small sound in the back of his throat, leaning his forehead against Eiji’s shoulder.

Eiji carded his fingers through Ash’s hair, gently working out the little knots that formed during the day. “I love you,” he said again. “Merry Christmas, Ash.”

  


**Author's Note:**

> if you liked this, please consider liking and reblogging [ here](http://misstchotchke.tumblr.com/post/181405860484/where-the-lovelight-gleams-my-entry-for-the)  
> find me on tumblr [here](http://misstchotchke.tumblr.com/)!


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